The Adventure of a Lifetime!!!

Me and my friend Ashley went to the mall today, on out bikes! Anyways, we walked ALL around the mall, went to every store... I had fun!
We got some Sunglasses, more like ten pairs..lol. And we got chopsticks and candy aswell. We walked for what seemed to be a while... loved it!
We had to leave at around 5:40, and we walked to our bikes. OKay, the mall has 5 stories, and we parked our bikes on the fith. So when we got to our bikes, we found them...not to be there...!
We started to panic, and started to freak out... then we saw a mall cop off in the disstance. I ran to him, and asked where our bikes were. He said that they were in the Security Office, on the OTHER side of the mall.
So we RAN to the other side of the mall, and when we got to the office, we found our bikes!!!
We asked the man if we could ride out bikes out the mall, he said no, but we could take them through an eerie hallway and up some stairs. So we truged up the stairs, caring out bikes, and we biked as fast as we could back to my dads shop.
Once we got to my dads shop, it was 6:04... I though that we were going to get it... but no. My cousin found Ashley's Blowup Doll, and inflated it, and took it on his bike and rode to the store. twas funny as fuck.. haha!

Hope to have another day like this again!!! :D

A Feeling of Hope

I know this is not the end, i can feel it in my bones... I know there is still hope for me and Kris...
You know, writing about my feelings is really helping me get through this. Im venting out what i feel, and i know that someone, somewhere, is reading this and I know that they care.
And for that, i thank you reader... :)

Is this the End?

I was talking to my sister the other day, and i told her about what i was going through, you know, about me and Kris. I told her about our complications, and after a while of back & forth conversation, i finaly realized...Im the only one that is participating in this one man relationship! I am the one to say hello first! I always send him Heart felt messages that i put effort into giving him, and he only replies in one or two words!... & I am pissed off because yesturday was 2 moths of being together, and when i checked my messages...nothing, not even a hello... and i am mad...but i cant be mad, i dont know his side of the story.
I need to clear this whole mess up, because i am mad at him for something that might not be what it seems...but i have no way of communicating him. -_-
What should i do???T.T

My Love/Private life?

Ive been extremely preocupied lately... to sum it up in a kind of short paragraph...

So ive been with Kris for two months already. Well, two months tomarow..We have been kind of seeing eachother over the summer, and it has been...rather difficult. Its not that we are fighting, its that we hardly see eachother... I love him, i really do, but i dont think that this long disstance relationship is working out. I feel abandonde really, but i want to keep things alive, im not going to quit in the midle of a beautiful relationship. This is the first time i have felt love twards someone...in the aspect of relayionship love.
Adding to another rant... ive spent 3 days at my best friends house. we have been haveing a realy awesome time, taking random pics, swimming, talking nonsence. the usual.. XD

Well untill next time... PEACE!

The Price of Past Fun

Kris and I have been really open with our rlationship lately... and ITS AWESOME!!! But the only thing that bothers me is that some of our friends think its really cute that we are together, and they keep asking us to kiss.. Now i dont mind kissing my boyfriend, but i want it to be our my terms, not other people's. Kissing is a sacred thing that should not be taken for granted, it is an act that two lovers share when the feel for one another. Am i right?

But... I digress.

I have been hearing some really scary things lately, about penal infections and other STDs. The day after Kriss & I fooled around, my throat has been feeling really irritated, and i am really scared... i dont know what it is, what it could be, and if i did catch something, did i catch anything else?! All i know is that he had another boyfrieng before me. Now they didnt go as far as we did, but im still going to interigate Kriss. Please... wish me the best of luck...

Jason Be Gone!!!

Last week i was suppose to go on a date with Jason, never happened, because, on Wednesday last week, i met a guy who actually has interest in me! Unlike Jason who wont divert his attention away from his wife... but, i digress.
The new guy's name is Kris Edwards, yeah, i actually know his last name! & tomarow will be one week. I can't wait, i wonder what he has planned, or if he even realizes it. But still, i wont go over the top or anything, because we already did, haha! But we have been getting alond fabulously.
Ive been texting Kris a crap load lately, and we have been haveing alot of fun. Its awesome to finaly find a guy of same preferance who is as affectionate, is as passionate as i am. I love it!
Someone asked me today if i had told him the three little special words to him yet, i said no, but i was thinking about it. Then i told them, "I really like him, but i think we should wait a while until we officialy bond. Even though we have...".
The next day(Wednesday, May 26)I met up with him before school. Everyone was signning year books, so i decided to partake in the signning. Kris came and we sat together on the floor as we wrote things in other people's books.
He started to talk sweetly to me, then i continue the sweet takl aswell. Then, out of nowhere, we kissed. Suprisingly, no one saw us.

Jason is Back..?

Well after the whole Andre thing, i tried to forget about it completely..SUCCESS!!! Any who, i t was rainning today and i saw Jason with a few of his friends. I go up to him and try to mingle myself into their group..FAIL!!! So i call him over to talk to him briefly.
It went something like this...:
"Jason...um...i have 10 dollars to last me the week and its not going to last me that long so, do you want to do something?"
"Um.. sure. Is friday okay? Because i cant go out durring the week, only on friday, saturday, and sunday."
"Okay. Thats fine!"
So im expecting a date this friday, so wish me luck. Im going to need it.

Its Not A Problem

I'm over Andre, and i can finaly get my mind clear. I would like to start back at the ways things where, but i know thats not going to happen. I just have to make the best of it, or atleast try to...

Break My Heart Why Don't You!

...okay, so the whole Jason thing dissapeared on Monday when i went out woth this guy, Andre. Iv'e known him longer than i have known Jason, so there was more of a click between us.
Any ways, Andre and i went out for two days, and i enjoyed them, but yestureday when we went for a walk, he turned to me and said "You know we have to break up". I said nothing, just trying to pretend he didn't say that. But he continued "I just don't want to be in a relationship right now" and then he left after giving me the worst, most sad hug i've ever gotten.
The thing is, he left me without any reason as to why he didn't want to be with me, he just left me hanging on that last thought, which really upsets me!
Look, im not mad at him, but im mad at the fact that he lead me on like that, or so it seem like a lead on.
I was thinking about this earlier today and i started to write, poeticly for some strange reason.

~I gave you my heart
and you broke it in two.
You left me there
without a word.
And now i don't know what to do.
My emotions are torn,
my mind is not at ease,
and you think you can dump me whenever you please!?
I let you in my arms
with trust and care,
but now that your gone
i am filled with disspare.
I don't miss you,
and thats just fine,
but even though you broke my heart,
its your loss,
not mine!~
(Original by yours truly)

I Have a Chance @ Romance

Okay... i was walking to the library and spoted Jason standing in the middle of the court yard. I rush to him before he can walk away, but i was being really akward with him.
But to my success, i was able to ask him out on a date next week! im really nervououse, i don't want to make myself look too desperate or even look like an idiot. I just have to stay away from any AKWARD PAUSES. God forbid that happens.
Wish me luck! ^_0

My Crush is Crushing Me

...I met a guy a few days ago, and yes he is also gay, he's so cute, and funny, and can put a smile on my face. His name is Jason, and I really like him, but i don't think he has any iterest in me. Whats there not to like about me. Not to sound conceded, but im nice, im chaming-ish, im funny at times, and im not that bad looking, am i?
IDK what to do, i want him to notice me, but when im around him, i cant even think of anything to say, let alone cary on a conversation without an AKWARD PAUSE. It would just be easier if we where alone, you know, just to talk so i can get a word out in edgwise, but sadly hes always around a girl names Rebecka. im not jelous or anything, its just that they are really great friends and inseperable, which makes it really hrad to talk to him.
Ill just try to make due with what i can, and hope for the best. OPTIMISM

Emergancy!!!

Today, i had the biggest icecream craving in the world. And i wanted a spesific flavor too. Mango Sorbet is the most delicious flavor on earth!
So i walked to a Ralphs thats near by, i go inside, look for the icecream isle, and i found out that they don't have any! I ask the manneger, and he tells me, "Sorry if we're out of stok, but i think Albersons has it".
So later, i go to Albersons, and the same frign thing happens, they are all out. One of the workers tells me to go to Vons, so i do.
And once i got to Vons.... the same thing happens. I was getting pissed. I needed this icecream or i would die.
If there is any information on to where i can buy Mango Sorbet icecream, please, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, write me back.
Thank You

Not My Best Day__

I wish i had a better tale to tell you, but unfortunately, this one is hurtful, spiteful, i almost wanted to... >:(
Today is National Day of Silence and a group of gay/gay loving friends of mine where going to stay silent and "spread the word" about D.O.S. We went far to send the message, but there are alot of people who think negatively about homosexuality.
I was helping a friend girl out with some duckt-tape, and a black guy is standing right next to us and said, "Yo, this shit is so stupid." I know he was talking about D.O.S. because my friend girl and i glared at him and he nervously backed away..
Later, i tried explaining D.O.S. to e few other people who were curious about what it was. I tried explaining without saying anything. (you can imagine how hard that was) Then some guy starts saying shit about this whole movment! I glared at him trying to tell him to shut the fuck up, but then he starts getting up in my face and asks if i want to fight! I couldnt say anything so he backs away and says, "You won't fight me, your not even man enough." That coment was... so... RRRAAAAHHHHHHH!!!
I'm not saying that i didn't know that there was alot of promescuity amungst homosexuals and the phobes, actually i was completely aware of it, i just didn't think it would happen in a place that seemed so... Accepting. But thats what you get when you expect to have Heaven in Hell.

[AND JUST TO GET IT OUT THERE, PEOPLE, IT YOU ARE GAY, LESBIAN, TRANSGENDER, OF EVEN BICURIOUS, PLEASE, FOLLWO ME IN MY MOVEMENT IN THE FIGHT TO MAKE THIS A BETTER PLACE FOR US. jUST LEAVE A COMENT AND I WILL GET BACK TO YOU AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.]